e-controlling.

Immature.  Pointlessly untrustworthy.  Selfish.

All of those words describe the narrow-minded people of all ages that simply can't trust the one they 'love' in having their very own social networking account (Myspace, Facebook, Twitter, Friendster, whichever).

It breaks your ♥ that these sites don't currently allow you to make a joint account.  I'm terribly sorry, but  they're not banks.

If your screen name is John-Amy Smith, or Kimberlyand Brian Jones, or Carol&Bob Buchanan.... do not friend request me.  You are probably the types that sit on the same side of the booths at restaurants because you can't stand to be too far away from the other.

Honey child, if he wants to cheat on you, he will.  Regardless of you sharing friends on your online profile, there are numerous avenues of philandering. Dumb bitch.

And bro, guys will continue to stare, talk to, and come on to your girl if they choose to. By monitoring her profile comments, picture comments, status updates and message inbox, you're only making yourself look even more ridiculous.  Macho moron.

If you're this untrustworthy, please stop dating.  Please stay single.  Please don't procreate.

.you are a plague.

Leia Mais…

For all of you dumb teachers out THEY'RE.

In a modern world filled with status updates and tweets, a lot of us you seem to be careless when it comes to our your grammar. Listen, I know not everyone cares as much as I do about typos and grammatical errors and that's completely fine. What ticks me off the most is when I see teachers- teachers that have at least a Bachelor's degree- using run-on sentences filled with the you're/your, there/their/they're errors. Shouldn't this have been learned in, like, 3rd grade? Are you actually teaching children? You mean, you have a degree to display? Do you know what a period (.) is?  This is one reason I think having a college degree means absolutely nothing. Absolutely nothing.  Please, please, please enlighten me on why you're smarter than me because you have a piece of paper saying so.  I take so much pride in being as educated as I am and need nothing to 'prove' it.

I can count at least four- FOUR- of my Facebook 'friends' [I use that term very loosely] that are blockheaded teachers actually working in a school system.

You know what? I wasn't going to, but I'm not above it... here's a quick lesson a lot of you missed in elementary school:

your- pronoun showing possession.  ex: Your jacket is in the closet.

you're - contraction of 'you are'. ex: You're a plague.

there - adverb meaning in or at that place (opposed to here). ex: She is there now.

their - pronoun showing possession. ex: Someone left their bratty child in my trunk.

they're - contraction of 'they are'. ex: I know they're bringing your ugly grandmother.

Let me ever discover that my child's teacher is a dumb ass that obviously needs more schooling. I'll school him/her for sure. 

.you are a plague.

Leia Mais…

[Black Friday] Jetta doesn't stand for 'betta'

Sooooo..... you have a silver 9-year-old VW Jetta.

What did you do to 'customize' it??

Let's see... rims, ground kit..... umm..... that's it.

You totally deserve two parking spots!

Let me delight you with the note I left under the windshield wiper:

'It's an old ass Jetta... NOT A BENTLEY'

.you are a plague.

Leia Mais…

The white Skecher no-no

You've had to have seen these women walking around Wal-Mart, or Cato, or Fashion Bug. They have on their tapered acid-washed jeans, short and/or big blonde hair with bangs you can see through..... and all-white Skechers. Why?

This form of female human also comes complete with some 12 year old Tommy Hilfiger, or dare I say, Fila t-shirt.

Stylin'.

.you are a plague.

Leia Mais…

Is it that hard to close your lips?

Maybe it's not just their personalities that make me have so much disdain for these two 'bruthas'.

Look. at. their. mouths.

Now tell me it doesn't aggravate you just looking at those big ugly holes on those misshapen faces...

.they are plagues. black plagues. no pun intended

Leia Mais…

Dust ruffle stacked hedgehog beehive

Ahh, so recently I got to enjoy 2 hours of my life at a Southern Christmas Show that I will never get back. This is only one snapshot I got to take while there...

It's bad enough every southern woman I can think of has the short, stacked, spiky haircut, but this... this is incomprehensible. It appears that this lady has the aforementioned Kate Gosselin-wannabe cut AAAAND has buried her face in the ground for a mini lawnmower to drive right over the middle of the back, leaving some sort of dust ruffle/mullet at the bottom.

You be the judge, and please enlighten me if this is going to be some 'new' thing for the 'stylish' Over the Hill crowd...

.she is a plague.

Leia Mais…

Witch? Angel? Fairy? Slut?

So that time of year just passed: little boys dress up as Spider-Man, little girls dress up as Cinderella and the 20s crowds go dance, get drunk, and get pregnant. So what's up with the latter? Has Halloween turned into bar-hopping and bed-hopping? Well, they're all adults (physically, anyway) so let them have their fun.

I guess my biggest peeve is how so many girls find the sluttiest, smallest, most unoriginal costume they can. Is that a type of mating call we don't have an official scientific explanation for? Does the semi-attractive blond female human dressed up as a 'cop' in navy blue panties, a badge, and handcuffs emit pheromones to the male humans? Or is it the 'construction worker' with a tool belt covering a thong that shouts, "I'm easy! And I can fix your door jamb!"
I don't even have words when it comes to the ubiquitous nurse costume...

.you are a plague.

Leia Mais…