Sunday, September 6, 2009

Take the following advice in any public parking lot...

You know those lazy asses that sit in the parking lot when they notice someone loading their trunk with groceries, all because they want that parking spot?
my advice: Go around them, back up directly in front of them, turn on YOUR turn signal and steal the spot; or, lay on the horn to piss them off; or, once you're in the store with them, follow them around and constantly 'accidentally' ram your shopping cart into theirs, politely apologizing each time.

Or even the losers that will slowly follow you to see if your spot is close enough to the store, then wait on you to leave and snatch the spot right up?
my advice: Walk slower. When you reach your vehicle, load the trunk, close it, then take out your cell phone, fake-dial someone, and lean against the back of the car pretending to have a conversation. [My wife does this and secretly gets a thrill from doing it]

Or what about the idiots that get into a yelling match over a parking spot?
my advice: Point and laugh. If you like to cause a scene, insult them in whatever way you see fit.

.you are a plague.

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